Kenyans once again take on Mugabe and "his" quotes

Kenyans are at it again. This time round they are on twitter sharing quotes attributed to their “Favorite” punch bag president Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe with the hashtag #PopularMugabesQuotes.

All manner of sayings and quotes have been attributed to Bob in the past raging from those with a sexual annotation to leadership and those laboring on racism in relation to his ever thawing relationship with the whites.

There is no doubt that Mugabe is a wisecrack and sometimes listening to him is more rib cracking than watching a comedy show on TV.

What is more true however is the fact that more than ¾ of the quotes attributed to him are not his but Kenyans have learnt that attributing them to him gives them more weight. And again, at his advanced age, he’s allowed to “say” some things the younger leaders cannot. Just like the way we let Kibaki get away with all manner of unpalatable words like “Pumbafu” and “Mavi ya kuku”and just smiled.

Sample:

Here are some of the quotes that have been shared on twitter attributed to President Mugabe………

Ø  If Obama want gaysm and lesbianism to be allowed in Africa, he must first get married to me

Ø  These homosexuals are worse than dogs & pigs.

Ø  As long as you are not using your dick to think fuck any good juicy opportunity that comes on your way

Ø  Only God who appointed me will remove me

Ø  If they only text you when its raining My sister you are an umbrella and a duvet

Ø  Corruption is more common in Kenya than COMMON SENSE.

Ø  Exposing your cleavage won't fix yo ugly face bitch!

Ø  Their is no need of you using a condom if you are uncircumcised just tie a knot at the end of your foreskin

Ø  When a crocodile throws you towards the land instead of the deep waters, do you go back fishing?

Ø  Whenever things seem to start going well in your life, the Devil comes along and gives you a *girlfriend

Ø  A cigarette is a pinch of tobacco rolled in a paper with a fire on one side and A FOOL on the other side

Ø  God is the best inventor ever. He took a rib from a man and created a loudspeaker...

Ø  The only white man you can trust is one that is lying on the grave 

Ø  It's better for a man to be stingy with money he worked for than a lady to deny you a hole she did not even drill

Ø  Swimming pool is much more useful than the Liverpool football club

Ø  Check your girlfriend's body, if she has more tattoos or piercings, you can cheat on her. She is already used to pain.

Ø  If you are ugly; you are ugly - stop talking about inner beauty because we don't walk around with X-rays

Ø  God is the best inventor ever. He took a rib from a man and created a loudspeaker

Ø  Ladies are powerful, they can introduce 2 boyfriends at the same time. They will say My Love meet My Sweet heart.

Ø  Some women's legs are like rumors, they just keep on spreading

Ø  I did not say all this shit!

Ø  Dating a slender guy is cool. The problem is when u are lying on his chest then his ribs draw adidas lines on your face

Ø  Cigarette Is a pinch of tobacco rolled in a piece of paper with fire on one end and a fool on the other end....

Ø  The size of a woman's ass is indirectly proportional to the size of her brain

Ø  We can only see the cock's anus when the wind blows.

Ø  Dear sister, don't be deceived by a man who text you "I miss you" only when it's raining. You are not an umbrella

To get more of these hilarious quotes, follow the hashtag #PopularMugabesQuotes on Twitter